Adventures of an Analog Man in the Digital Universe, with a little help from my friends and relations.

Saturday, April 30, 2005

Here's a list everybody will want to participate in and send me an e-mail or leave a comment, top five reasons I want to chop off the head of Nonkinsense or for that small minority with the highly evolved brains, who get it, the top five reasons I enjoy what's in the head of Nonkinsense. Posted by Hello


Nobody can, sing the blues, like Blind Willie McTell..

Seen the arrow on the doorpost
Saying, "This land is condemned
All the way from New Orleans
To Jerusalem."
I traveled through East Texas
Where many martyrs fell
And I know no one can sing the blues
Like Blind Willie McTell

Well, I heard the hoot owl singing
As they were taking down the tents
The stars above the barren trees
Were his only audience
Them charcoal gypsy maidens
Can strut their feathers well
But nobody can sing the blues
Like Blind Willie McTell

See them big plantations burning
Hear the cracking of the whips
Smell that sweet magnolia blooming
(And) see the ghosts of slavery ships
I can hear them tribes a-moaning
(I can) hear the undertaker's bell
(Yeah), nobody can sing the blues
Like Blind Willie McTell

There's a woman by the river
With some fine young handsome man
He's dressed up like a squire
Bootlegged whiskey in his hand
There's a chain gang on the highway
I can hear them rebels yell
And I know no one can sing the blues
Like Blind Willie McTell

Well, God is in heaven
And we all want what's his
But power and greed and corruptible seed
Seem to be all that there is
I'm gazing out the window
Of the St. James Hotel
And I know no one can sing the blues
Like Blind Willie McTell

Copyright © 1983 Special Rider Music

Posted by Hello

It's getting near dawn, when lights close their tired eyes, I'll soon be with you my love, to give you my dawn surprise. - I'll be with you darling, soon. - I'll be with you when the stars start falling. Posted by Hello

"Blue Moon Of Kentucky"

Blue moon of Kentucky keep on shinin'
Shine on the one that's gone and left me blue
I said blue moon of Kentucky keep on shinin'
Shine on the one that's gone and left me blue

[with music]

Well is was on one moonlit night
Stars shinin' bright
Whispered all night
Love said goodbye


Hava nagila, hava nagila
Hava nagila venis'mecha


Hava neranena, hava neranena
Hava neranena venis'mecha

Uru, uru achim
Uru achim belev same'ach

Let us rejoice
and be glad


Let us sing

Awaken brethren
With a cheerful heart.
Posted by Hello

Musicians, particularly female ones, he has digitized, want Nonkinsense to leave you the hell alone, do what I did:

Words and music by Mars Bonfire

Get your motor runnin'
Head out on the highway
Lookin' for adventure
And whatever comes our way
Yeah Darlin' go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fire all of your guns at once
And explode into space

I like smoke and lightning
Heavy metal thunder
Racin' with the wind
And the feelin' that I'm under
Yeah Darlin' go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fire all of your guns at once
And explode into space

Like a true nature's child
We were born, born to be wild
We can climb so high
I never wanna die

Born to be wild
Born to be wild

© MCA Music (BMI)
All rights for the USA controlled and administered by
MCA Corporation of America, INC

--Used with permission--

Posted by Hello

I write Sopranos, Prisoner, Yogi and Friends, Elmer Fudd, Star Trek Parodies, with Beaver Brown and Springsteen mentions, not to mention all the Personal Noise and Knockouts, even Giggle Factor, references, and Bel,Mah, Esp, Lap, Neil, Tesp, and not one e-mail or comment, that says, hey, Rick, I like that, it was very the way, if anybody, still cares, I'm feeling better this evening, thanks mainly, to Hong Kong City, Chicken Noodle Soup, large and the Chicken and Eggplant in Garlic Sauce, large, sadly, my Voodoo bead, that I wore Monday, afternoon, broke already, Son of a Bitch, who would place a reverse curse on Rick or my saloon. Posted by Hello

Does the Brazilian Buffet, Sushi, Broadway Diner Canolis, Franks on Grill by Michael, that's right I said Franks, Peking, JandLloyd Platter, Volcano Pizza, come this far up, in Camden Yards, and what about my French Toast with Vicks Vapor Rub? - I think I'll need a cup of hot tea with lemon, no sugar, up here, today! WHY? SO WE CAN DO THE WAVE AND START THE CHANT? WHAT CHANT? LET'S GO YANKEES, no I'll leave that to nearly everybody else, but our chant, everybody: Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call Rose, Let's Call, Norris, Phil and Marge?Posted by Hello

Let's Go Mets, Let's Go Mets, Let's Go Mets, Lets Go Fuzzy? Posted by Hello

I know you've been asked for your top five favorite Jewish Rockers, but, how about, as we wait for Louie and Uvy, and keep the door open, you give me the top five Jewish Baseball players of all time, hell, why not, the top five Jewish, Sportmen or Sportswomen of all time, while you're at it...I'm not asking for five all time great Chinese Hockey Players from Saskatoon or Medicine Hat? Posted by Hello

More excuses for not responding to a fun evening/day Jamming:

1-I would but Nonkinsense will be there
2-There's no single men / women
3-There's no married men / women
4-They're All Gay
5-They're all gay in the studios by the elevator
6-I don't know the songs you're playing
7-I know the songs you're playing
8-I'm having my tubes tied
9-It's the night of my vastecomy
10-On religious principle, I'll say no
11-Another piece of god damn spam
12-Berliner pays better
13-Montay can score me some of the finest Columbian
14-Where's the drugs?
15-Where's the sex?
16-Where's the rock n roll?
17-The lead singer hates me
18-The drummer despises me
19-The bass player loates me and makes too many spelling errors
20-The sax player curses my entire family under their breath, and does not think I should be using as many commas as I do.
21-I'm having my hair done
22-My boyfriend's back
23-He's A Rebel
24-Hey, Mr Tambourine Man
26-Busted on Coke

27-I would, but, I have this thing with Immigration
28-Isn't there a good movie playing
29-I'm going to be on the TKTS line
30-I have tickets to Good Vibrations and Streetcare Named Desire, you know, STELLA, STELLA, CAN YOU SING OR PLAY DRUMS?!!??
31-I'm doing a photo shoot
32-I'd rather be shot in the head
33-I'm a leper
34-Can't control my Personal Noise at night
35-I have family coming in from out of town
36-I'm having my family for dinner from out of town
37-I'm eating my family from out of town in a tribute to Jeffrey Dahmer
38-They're doing the same thing on Murray Street, cheaper
39-They're doing the same thing on Murray Street, on Crack
40-They're doing the same thing on Murray Street with door prizes provided by Number 24.
41-They're doing the same thing on Murray Street and giving away passes for New York Dolls and or the Harry Smiths.Posted by Hello

Smitty, promise me you still play the piano, that I bought you with a part time job from Brooklyn College, that I paid out for two years, please get it tuned, stick up for yourself, you've done nothing wrong, would not hurt anybody ever in your life, come from a family of doctors, lawyers and butchers, I had a lot of injections and three miscarriages so I could have you, I ate plenty of eggs, thank god, I da Pedowitz, you came out foot first, you were a breech, that explains, so much, I think, take care of your cold, don't fly so often, I like that you're traveling, so much, ask Norris, please, for me, again, tell him, to shake a leg, what is he waiting for, does he still have the old lady's couch, what does he do all day, WAH, every day, WOIS?, Times, NY 1, FAN, Schluff, I cry at night, I'm glad you called Rose, at least, Louise called Rose and you got on , in Maryland, did you tell her about the unveiling? Tell the cemetary or IJ Morris, to get with it already, it's over a year, February 11th, did I leave you enough money in the SYLIRA account?, I must have left you Peter Crosby's number, did you try to tell them that Psychiatry, was nothin' but a racket run by the Jews and now by people who don't speak English. The drugs don't work, at least, not for us, therapy is a big nothin', do you think marriage counseling help me and your father, even at the Jewish Federation, and Big Smitty won't change, even after the counseling on Sheepshead Bay Road, up the flight of stairs , with the Social Worker, I insisted on going with him, without you, and that I paid for...I'm glad to hear about Eliot and Donny, I liked all your friends, Norris' friends, which one was the Ronnette? the Double L, the Sandwich, the Instant?, did you ever tell anybody about them? - whatever happened to Polinski, he was a good friend, I liked his mother, she loved everything about our trip to Maine, I loved Wilbur, I can't forget what he did for us when he drove us to IJ Morris after your father died. Posted by Hello

Mom, I've done a lot of good things, since you've been gone, most of which, all of which, if you think about it, except for the four letter words, you would be so proud of, I kept the things you made and the poetry, and the family history you wrote with recollections from Shirley, Annie and Sandra, but, I miss you so much, nobody, thinks that much of me, down here, and Bay Plaza was torn down to make way for Condos, that even the Horse can't afford, as if he would move out of his studio, to be next to RnR, instead of a hop skip and a jump to Empire King, Quiznos, Cactus, Silver Star, Citibank, Care Pharmacy, a new 99 cent store, the Russian Cafe, that nobody goes into, at least, not during the day or early evening, that used to be Pop and Son or Mike Nelson's office and Peking. Posted by Hello

I thought I taught you to respect women, and those four letter words, not in my house, I did not speak to my mother like that, god forbid, and my father would get finely dressed even for breakfast, and for supper, he'd put a polka of chicken under the table, for me, so momma would not see, did you let everybody know I made Arista, ANG WONG WAY, CATCH A LAMA, LAMA ZAY ? don't copy your father when he gets verbally abusive to me over an orange and his trip to Florida New Years, tell Norris to get off his ass, already, take any job, even it's at Empire King, God, is that how I raised my College Graduated sons, to want in life, Chinese and Chinese Buffets, has anybody been up to see Norris' apartment, does he not want to live better than a studio without a terrace, now that you're communicating to Eliot and Donny, can they tell him to get a haircut, buy, shoes, a tie and a dress shirt, for an interview, oy vey, he'll die alone, without a job, does he use your computer, at least, will he ever get a new paintjob, or do we have to e-mail Paulie Walnuts and his crew, or here's a brilliant, idea, get Dominic, does Annie or Shirley, at least call, once in a while, if you want Sandra Doodle at the unveiling, I'm ok with that, let her pay for the gas, did Alan, build another house, for himself and his family, I'm jealous, do me a favor, call or e-mail Judy, and if it's June, call Anita and Dave, make sure, Selma and Morris are there, this time, it's very important, I'm so proud you bought a new car, SPEND SPEND SPEND, LIFE IS TOO SHORT, SPEND, SPEND, SPEND, YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TOMORROW WILL BRING, I KNOW YOU WOULD HAVE TAKEN EVERY LEGAL ACTION POSSIBLE TO GET JUSTICE FOR WHAT THOSE DOPES DID TO ME, THEY KILLED ME, THE HOSPITAL, THE DRUGS, THE SOCIAL WORKERS, THE STAFF, THE RELAXATION CD, ZYPREXA, EXPECIALLY, I WAS NOT DIABETIC, WHO THEY TRYING TO KID, HEART CONDITION, TOTAL ARROGANT BULLSHIT, OVERWEIGHT, I WATCHED MYSELF, AS WELL AS SELMA WATCHES WHAT MORRIS EATS, SHIT, SHIT, SHIT, YOU LOST THE APARTMENT TO RUSSIANS, I understand, BUT, COULDNT YOU SAY MY MOM KNEW MIKE NELSON AND HAD HER BLOOD PRESSURE CHECKED AT CARL KRUEGER'S OFFICE, DR. ROSEN DID ME WRONG AT THE BEGINNING, HE THOUGHT I WAS A NERVOUS NELLY, OVERLY CONCERNED ABOUT MY CHILDREN, DID YOU GET A FULL TIME JOB YET, GOOD IDEA TO LOOK IN THE DC AREA, MAYBE CALIFORNIA, I'LL GO WITH YOU, I'M BORED UP HERE, I CAN'T FIND A GOOD LIBRARY, AND MOST OF THE PEOPLE SPEAK HEBREW, AND NOT YIDDISH, I'm so glad about Louise and Michael and their children, that was so nice, and did you say thanks to Phil and Marge, I forgot about the Wedding Gift Thank you notes, from up here. Posted by Hello

Of all the e-mails in all the world you had to respond to this one, sister:

Rick: I told him, play it Sam, you played it for her you can play it for me, he said but Mr. Rock,: But, but...

Rick: I said play Sam! and then and only then does he do a Dick Clark impression and goes into the Nuvim theme, while singing "As Time Go By."

Rick: mumbling to himself, we always had Paris...Oh yes, what memories, the Paris Hilton. Posted by Hello

It's no SECRET, I was not chasing after you, I'm a happily married man, I adore my wife, and the Jewish religion, but, that's right, I said, but, don't you play accordian, sing and play drums at the same time, and are available for Friday evenings, starting at 6 or 6:30PM?!!?? AND BY THE WAY, NOW THAT I GOT EVERYBODY'S ATTENTION:

need to do a list on people that are worthy of being taken in by Jeb Bush or saved by Congress.
Posted by Hello

Ladies, on behalf of the Commander and myself, what we're really looking for, is someone to come down and play drums Monday Lunch time, when the Creative Genius, that is Tom, has to find new ways of saying FACTORY AND DEALER APPROVED PRE-OWNED VECHICLES, SALE ENDS SUNDAY, NO CREDIT, NO PROBLEM. Posted by Hello

About 10 years ago, someone gave me a hanging mobile made from hammered and twisted flatware. There were a coupld of flattened spoons, two knives attached by strings to a fork with bent and curled tines. After about a year, my son tired of whacking his head into this hanging shit-mobile and removed all the parts, leaving the fork in place.
After all these years, why hasnt anyone ever pointed out that I have a twisted fork attached to a string, hanging from my kitchen ceiling? what a masterpiece...

anyone who knows me knows that I have been trapped in a decorating dilemma for a long time, wanting to paint my apt, but unable to choose colors for fear that I will be living a sea of purple passion or ghastly green for years to come. so the fact that I have a fork suspended from the ceiling as one of the LONE decorative items in my house is really sick Posted by Hello

Paulie, has a lot on his plate, right now, oh by the way ol' chap, when we're back in the States, let's go this time to J. n Lloyd, across the street, pretty much, from Richard Yees, and if we hook up with Marie, Adelman's on Kings Highway, if we're in Queens with the Kings and Queens, how about Ben's, or did we have that last night in the City, on 38th Street? So sorry to let you in on this, but, the corner deli on U and Ocean is a Russian Pharmacy, where you can get a lot of drugs, legally, this time, next to Pupp City, or is it a Cellular Phone place, I forget, hey, ol' chap, do you remember Izzy and Nat, Corned Beef Corner, Grabstein's ? And Mr. Wilbur, mate, if you're reading this, Do you still think, Sparky's Funny? - not Anderson or Lyle, U know what I'm talking about, do you think we can say Greita Weitz and Diarehha, and people will know, what we're talking about, how about covering, Benji's Song, Hey Charlette, Introvert, ah, yes, the Y, Grossman on Keys, OTB on U, Richie losing all his parents money on the Horses and then marrying a SHIXER - this will clue you in regarding Creation, I take some exception to the STARVED of success bit:

When The Creation split up after a career starved of success and recognition, the group members no doubt expected to fade slowly into obscurity. However, interest in the band was piqued when record industry entrepreneur Alan McGee formed a fledgling record label and named it "Creation" after the band. As the label gained success and notoriety, so did interest in the group that gave Creation its name. In the 1990s the band reformed for a series of shows, and with their popularity scaling heights never previously thought possible, they completed a highly successful tour. This release offers a show from the Mean Fiddler in London, as well as interviews from the rightly venerated and overjoyed band members. Posted by Hello

Putz, ask your readers, for their top five Brooklyn Delicatessens, or any top five delicatessens in the F-n country, including Corky and Lenny's in Cleveland, and for God's sake, say thank you Marie, and remember these couple of things, I tried to teach you when you thought you could play Baseball: Es ken zein harb, oich di reichsteh arb, Es iz leichter bei andereh chesroines tsu gefinen vi bei zich meiles. Posted by Hello

Pesach ends Sunday Night, God Willing! - Es lacht zich alain un es vaint zich alain- one laughs alone and weeps alone - Es libt zich alain, shemt zich alain - he who praises himself will be humiliated - Es sholgen zich aleh far di shtikeleh challeh - this one we all should remember, this time of year - ALL FIGHT FOR A PIECE OF BREAD! Posted by Hello

Ain't that right, mates, Martin, Brinsley, Andrew, Stephan, Rob, not pictured, before anyone else gets hurt and they, this time, close this Music Consumer gone Amok, Nonkinsense thing down, give us either your favorite living guitar players that you've seen in concert, or best band you saw behind an individual artist...And after you do that, give 'em your top five cold and cough remedies for colds that last longer than three days, and top five ways to get out of a Rock n Roll Band, that seems to be at the top of its game, about to hit big, and then five top ways to say to a friend or relative, I'm sorry, for whatever, I did or did not do, I'm really just trying stuff out here, for a couple of laughs, shits and giggles, no more , no less, or the top five ways, you should know you've become an embarrassment, nusiancesense, pest, exploiter, self indulgent, self promoter, obnoxious a-hole, un-Christian, un-Judaic-Christian, un-any religious affiliation, with an axe to grind and a blog.Posted by Hello

Okay mates, we follow Paulie Walnuts' lead, and ask you for your favorite underrated singer/songwriters without Mass Appeal. Posted by Hello

Don't let my CUM LAUDE, DEANS LISTED, COMMUTING, NO THOUGHT OF LEAVING HOME AND HIS MOTHER'SUPPER AND FATHER'S HEAD FOR HOMEWORK AND WORKING TOGETHER, CUNY Colleged GRADUATED TV/Radio Nephew, get away with his bullshit on names, from now on, it's Rosalita, Sherry Darlin', Bobby Jean, Fourth Of July Asbury Park, Little Latin Lupe Lu, Mary's Place, Mary Queen of Arkansas, Adam raised a Cain, Candy's Room, Crazy Janey and the Mission Man, Janey Don't You Lose Heart, Big Man joined the band, Wendy, tramps like us, Hazy Davy and Killer Joe, got really hurt, Tweeter and the Monkey Man...Sorry, I forgot, I'm just a bisell mishugga, right now, with this cold, cough and sore throat, from the god damn Airlines, and stopovers in Atlanta, however, I like to sing, Dylan tunes, along with Songs from Italy. ..Ver es shayn nor ich bin klug, A tserissen gemit iz shver tsum hailen, A tsoreh kumt nit alain, A vaicher vort brecht a bain, A veibelehiz a teibeleh un a teiveleh, A vort iz vert a sileh; shveigen iz vert tsvai, A vort iz azoi vi a feil - baideh hoben groisseh eil, A mentsh tracht un Got lacht, remember that one, ya' Momma!Posted by Hello

Dave Edmunds, we love at Nonkinsense, it's as Subtle as a Flying Mallet, for a long, long time, why not record and perform this Arch Hall, Jr. song, before Junior Brown gets a hold of it: Nobody Lives on the Brownsville Road

At the old rock house on the Brownsville Road, the crazy things happen according to the code.

You turn to the left at the sign of the toad... to the empty old house on the Brownsville Road.

The old rock house on the Brownsville Road, crazy things happen according to the code.

The code of the ghost at the sign of the toad... nobody lives on the Brownsville Road.

Oh, they scream and they sway and they bring in the day and the wind sounds make you shiver.

They dance and they sing 'til the wild ones ring and the noise goes down to the river.

You see, no one lives on the Brownsville Road.

They grin and rave of the cool, cool grave and they do the razzamatazz.

Their neckbones click as they swing their chicks... a'rockin' to the Brownsville jaaaaazz.

At the old rock house on the Brownsville Road, crazy things happen according to the code.

The code of the ghost at the sign of the toad... nobody lives on the Brownsville Road.

Like, nobody lives there... DIG?

Arch Hall Jr, sorry I missed you in New Orleans, this song, says it all: Vickie

I love you, Vickie. You know I do.

My whole life has changed. For the first day we met was my last day with you.

Vickie, oh-ho Vickie... what have I done?

Why can't we make up? We could ha-haaave so much fun.

If you don't love me, I was a foo-ooo-ooo-ooo-ool.

Oh, Vickie... you aah-are my love.

Vickie, oh-ho Vickie... I'm so alone.

If you would just talk to me, if I could just call you... on the phone.

Would you give one more cha-aaa-ance to a foo-ooo-ooo-ooo-ool?

Oh Vickie, you aah-are my love.

You aah-are my love.

Vickie, you are my love.

PURE BRILLIANCE. Whenever you're in town again, look up The master storyteller at work as he describes a love-at-first-sight experience although it's a one-sided whirlwind romance that quickly disintegrates into a horrible stalker situation... all during the course of a single day. The lyrics also imply that a restraining order was issued Posted by Hello